"That" Mom

What is it about "that" mom?

I have a "mom" complex. I am desperately insecure about not being "that" mom, while simultaneously being dreadfully afraid about being "that" mom. Let me explain.

My grandmother, Mom, and older sister are all supermoms. They cook, clean, and mother beautiful children (I realize I'm indirectly complimenting myself here...). My grandmother and mom each had four, but my amazing sister takes it to a whole new level. She has four kids, ages four and under, is homeschooling, and still plans to have more. Moms like her cause me to doubt my own mothering ability and wish I were one of "those" moms...

On the other hand, I don't ever want to be"that" mom. "That" mom whose kids are running amok in the grocery store, throwing fits in the aisles and holding up the check-out line. "That" mom who loses it in frustration and receives downward glances from the other onlooking moms. "That" mom who looks like she doesn't have it altogether...

What does God require of me as a mom? How do I discover my unique gifts and qualities as a mom and learn to walk in peace and wisdom as the mom God created me to be. How do I keep from comparing and pretending and striving to meet the perceived expectations of other moms instead of my God's?

I say all this to say... Help! I want to be a woman, and mom, that reflects the character and integrity of the Word. God is weeding through my fears and ungodly expectations. I can feel how I am going against the grain of other parents I meet in our community. I am so exhausted I can barely stay standing throughout the day.

I am "that" mom. I am "that" mom who stands on the word, who worships the King of Kings, who rely's on God's grace to get through a day. I am "that" mom who loses her temper, gets tired of reading stories, is overwhelmed by housework, but is dedicated to discipling our girls. I am "that" mom who lays her head on her pillow, closes her eyes, and hears the Word of God stirring in her spirit.

"God I don't know all that went on today, the ups and downs and ins and outs, but I know Your Presence is with us. Lead and guide us each day. Show me the way! As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord!!!"